I have a beautiful dear friend whom I love with all my heart. She is now 93. I think of her often and my occasional calls to her are more often than not met with her answering machine. Very rarely do I hear from her now, but when I do it always reminds me of heart connections and the little gifts from God in relationships that are the most meaningful of all.
She also loved my mom and came to know her well through me over the years. Since our move I haven't spoken with her although I have tried so I have texted her granddaughter to be sure she is still planting and tending her flowers and living on her own because when those activities are not able to be part of her day I know the end is near...or I should say the beginning of her eternity with God.
I find myself wondering if I will speak to her again on this side of eternity and it makes me sad to think not. Last night she was heavy on my heart and I desperately want to see her when I go home to visit and intended to track her down, so when my phone rang when I was barely out of bed this morning and I saw her name on the screen I knew God had given me one of those special gifts today.
I had to call her back as she didn't realize it was me actually answering the phone and I came to learn later she didn't even know who she was calling but dialing a number that was on her appointment book...one that she has used for many years to keep her client's information and appointment times in.
She was surprised but excited to know she called ME!! Of course I was more excited because I had been wanting to talk to her and at 93 I realize any conversation we may have could be our last while on the Earth.
We quickly jumped in where we left off with the hurts of this world, the disappointments of those we expected more from, the failing economy, the destruction of Capitalism and the concerns of the preservation of The American Dream, and then we discussed the reality of when it all fades, disappoints, and fails, there is only one place where our confidence is never shaken and that is in our hope of all that God does in spite of it all...and of course in the anticipation of eternity that will surpass every conceivable expectation in a God who loves us and in whose sacrifice we trust.
She then told me that she woke up this morning from her dream and it was of her at the bedside of my mom when she was dying and her remembering how she consoled her just before her passing from death into life. She told me that she couldn't believe she had dialed a number she didn't know and it was ME!
We made a plan to make a plan and I will either visit or we will go out to lunch soon but she reminded me that more importantly than our plans, our hearts are woven together and we have been through a lot together and that she has always wanted and believed the best for me and knows how difficult and hopeless my battles have seemed and yet God has brought us through with a deeper faith, a greater reward and a far greater purpose than we ever could of imagined.
And then she said something that made me chuckle despite the realization that at 93 with that type of call, I may not be hearing from her again, and that was that she is glad she dials numbers she doesn't know.
ME TOO, my sweet Theresa, ME TOO!!
“You will remember this when all else fades, this moment, here, together, by this well. There will be certain days, and certain nights, you’ll feel my presence near you, hear my voice. You’ll think you have imagined it and yet, inside you, you will catch an answering cry. On April evenings, when the rain has ceased, your heart will shake, you’ll weep for nothing, pine for what’s not there. For you, this life will never be enough, there will forever be an emptiness, where once the god was all in all in you.”
― John Banville, The Infinities